We’ve all been there. We’ve all dated that person and we’ve all definitely slept with that person.
What initially comes off as a good time and a girl who knows her stuff between the sheets, quickly turns into a “what are you doing?”, “why aren’t you answering your phone?”, “where are you?” type of situation that makes you want to gouge your eyes out and swear off random hook ups (ok, let’s not go that far). Dealing with clingy women can be tricky, but is necessary if you didn’t have the foresight to steer clear of them before getting them naked. Check out these escape tricks you can use when dealing with a clingy ass trick. Execute with caution and at your own will.
Lean on Social Media:
Start small and cut in to her jealous and competitive side by mentioning multiple women (including her) in one tweet or Facebook post. Make it sexual, “like which one of you is coming home with me tonight?” Granted, this is a good way to get rid of multiple women at once. But they’ll suddenly get the picture that they aren’t the only one.
Or, continuously post photos of you and other hot women from the club on your Instagram account. Be sure to link it to your Facebook account, too, so she’ll be sure to see it.
Move On:
Let her know that you’re moving to another city for a new job opportunity. Then don’t tell her that your new job does not allow you to reveal your whereabouts. Park your car in the garage or elsewhere for the first week. Then stop caring. If she drives by and notices you’re still there, she should have at least gotten the hint. If it’s really bad, consider actually moving, across town or across the state. Bitches can be crazy.
Hook Up Evidence:
Prior to inviting her over, make your room look like a sexual tornado rolled through. Mess up the sheets, leave a condom on the floor, maybe a pair of girls underwear and a few Adam & Eve sex toys about. Try to playfully avoid having her go into your room, but then let her. Apologize by saying you had a pretty crazy party the night before.
STD’s:
Just calmly tell her one day that you’ve contracted the Herp. You don’t know how or from who, but that it’s best if you don’t see each other anymore while you deal with this hard time in your life. This one may backfire as she may tell people you have herpes, but whatever, just deal with it when the time comes.
Change Your Style:
Whether you’re repping that suit and tie, the hipster look, or the baggy jeans, change it up when you’re around her. Go with something that will totally put her off and then tell her you’ve developed a strong affinity for John Mayer and Taylor Swift. Long gone are the days of 2 Chainz and Wale. She’ll lose interest pretty quickly.
You don’t need to be talented for this one. Just let her know that she inspired you to write a song about her. She’ll be flattered until you start to rap and it turns out to be a song about leaving her for someone else. Whoops.
Be honest:
Or you know… you can be a man and tell her that she’s crazy, needs to calm down and you’re not into it. Whatever you wanna do, it’s your prerogative.